Cluttered Chrissy
Dear Red!
I am always feeling overwhelmed from stress at work to kids to extra activities. I was very social prior to the pandemic …. But I haven’t gotten back out there fully. I seem to enjoy my down time and alone time but I never get to truly watch tv or chill.
I feel I never have enough time in the day. My nightly alarm at 10pm reminds me of what I have to do tomorrow so I can create reminders. But I think this causes me some anxiety. I have clutter & papers that I need to go through. I feel easily distracted and devices don’t help. I think I have undiagnosed ADHD and does it relate to clutter? Is there a test I can take to see if I have adhd?
Thank you!,
Cluttered Chrissy
*****
Dear Cluttered Chrissy,
I can only imagine the life hacks you’ve tried. You want to be able to fully rest and have focus for the things that matter. There’s no perfect answer to what’s at the root of being easily distracted and cluttered - not without someone really sitting down with you and doing a full assessment.
It’s often through trial and error that people find the right clinician, diagnosis and treatment plan. It’s exhausting, paralyzing and for someone like you (that has a hard time with focus) - defeating. Isn’t that ironic? Looking for help can actually trigger some of the raw emotions related to the very thing we need help with!
You probably know this - but there is a spectrum of neurodiversity on which ADHD falls. A really thorough assessment from a professional feels like the ticket here. That’s usually expensive, though - and insurance often doesn’t cover it (especially as an adult). If you want to start with an ADHD hypothesis, Google “Neuropsych Testing” in your area and look for a PsyD.
You could also start with a therapist who can refer you to a specialist (if you decide together you need one). On the other hand, you can also try a specialist who might refer you to a therapist (depending on the findings in the assessment). I say this because sometimes ADHD symptoms can have its roots in depression. Other times there are relational factors at play (if you don’t feel secure in your most important relationship, it can wreak havoc on your daily functioning).
The tricky part is - every mental health professional has their biases. People who are good at what they do become very well-versed in one or two things. They start to see everything through that lens. This is why you have to become your own advocate - almost no one will genuinely be able to see the full picture. I see you fighting for yourself already - by reaching out and writing your “Cluttered Chrissy” letter!
Assuming you don’t have endless time, energy and resources to do the research to find the person to get the help you need - I encourage you to do it anyway. Even if it feels like it takes you forever. You’re worth it. And everyone reading this - you too. Ask the questions, and then ask them again to someone else.
You’ve got this,
Red